AwkwardSam

The reason why I push people out if my life is because they never stay. I hold on to them and hope for them so much and they just disappoint me. Always. Its always me and thats all its ever going to be. Im a nobody to them. Im not important. I feel like I dont entertain as much or I dont provide when I do. Im done. Im so done with everyone whom I let in, just leave me. IM SO FUCKING DONE. THATS THE REASON WHY I PUSH PEOPLE. THATS THE REASON WHY I DONT TRUST. THE REASON WHY I HIDE. THE REASON WHY IM SAD AND LONELY. CUZ NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT WHAT THEY SAY. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT HOW OTHERS FEEL. NO ONE CARES ABOUT THE SACRIFICES AND STRU

I made a list of things that a really hard to find now a days 1.) Good friends -I say this because recently I have been dubbed as the bad guy for trying to protect my friends from someone that is doing them harm. I also recently just stopped caring about a few people because I realize that I care so much about them but not the same vice versa. 2.) Good Music - Its really hard to avoid those crappy popular music. I dont look up too any artist or singer or anyone. Yes i am a fan but im not the one to worship anyone. 3.) Anything that you place somewhere and leave for 2 seconds - I do this all the time. I put something on the table and the

And yet I still dont understand why we hold on.... Interms of thought and memory Understanding what its like To feel to breath to be one... I wanna be that one that weaves with the earth... I want to be the blossoms above all.... I want to be the sweetest fruit that will not be forgotten.... I want to be that thought that forever lingers I want to be everything and nothing all at ones... I want to be the shiver beneth each tickle.. I want to lose and gain life... And yet with all the things I want... Internally I want nothing but the passion... The needs.... The one not forgotten As always I yern for nothing more than to not be forgot